All the Kings horses...

Awakening now, opening her eyes she moved her hand quickly to shield them from the brightness of the early morning light. Khanid Prime, where she had now called home for a few months, had grown to be a bitter gall in her stomach. She looked over to see her captor, the Physician Jacob R Gunning, who had 'saved her' from certain death. He had for some reason since then, come up with a myriad of reasons over the last few weeks to prevent her from heading back to her home. Excuses really. 'You need more therapy'. 'Studies are not back yet on probable cause.' 'What if you need to clone again, could you withstand it?' 'Your scars need a certain treatment only available at this top secret unit.' And on and on the reasons went. She as yet was not sure just what the real reasons were, but had over many weeks time, begun to plot out her own escape plans such as they might be.

She saw the infamous Doc Gunning as he headed back inside, and noted like clockwork the AI-med units preparing to bring the other patients back inside. While gathering her limited use datapad they had given her not long ago, she quickly wrapped up a diary notation on exercises done, goals met, and the other mundane requirements. Reflecting as she did, on facts she had learned not long after her recovery and 'awakening' began, that she was not the only pilot being treated. It seemed to her, the patient list had grown quite long over time. She considered with a wry bit of humor that no doubt the Empire needed to tweak its Cloning facilities in some of the more remote regions to prevent such disasters. Walking slowly still, She sighed, knowing full well the probability of monies being funneled that route were near to never. Just as she was about to head through the secure barriers she stopped for a moment as something caught her peripheral vision. Hitome turned to look past the others off toward the city.

What had caught her attention was a black cat walking along the wall between two buildings some 0.25 kilometers away. Sinewy and alert it stopped many times to look around its secluded area, then it paused, listening. watching. calculating. Hitome heard another call for her to pack it up, and was about to look away when she noticed two small balls of fur slip from some bushes and scurry up to the cat. The exchange between the creatures was silent but as if on cue the three of them cut left into some bushes and slipped from view. At first she wondered what had stirred them then, she heard and noted a procession of the Royal family coming into view, all on horseback and heading down that very path toward the gates to the city. Some crazy idea the Khanid Royals had to revive an old tradition. She stared after them for the longest time as a tiny smile lit one corner of her lips dying off rapidly when she realized she was now being bullied into heading back inside.

As she was ushered inside, words that had burned through her heart and soul over this last month blazed back harsher than the sun above. Something her beloved friend Aldrith had said them when he visited. " You've been taking an awfully long nap, haven't you?." Her answer had not been spoken in so many words then. Words had not come easily. He was right though. "Yes. I have Aldrith. In so many more ways than mere slumber." She touched her fingers to the scars on her forehead tracing their jagged edges and made a failed attempt to brush the hair back to cover them. "Yes, I have slept for years it seems." A streak of pain attempted to course through her heart. She ignored it. Steeling herself to focus on her only main goal in life now. She looked down at the datapad that she was handing over to her medic. On the screen was one phrase written over. and over. and over.

...Only one thing matters: Reclaim that which is lost. Only one thing matters: Reclaim that which is lost. Only one thing matters: Reclaim that which is lost...

As the medic units handed her nightly pills for sleep and she supposed were vitamins, she was careful to tuck the one pill she had deduced over time, made her so groggy. She planned to act soon. Last thing she wanted was to be too weak and listless to accomplish her task. You've been taking an awfully long nap, haven't you?

Hitome yawned and lay down, but sleep did not come. The nightmares she could fight away better if the sleep, was kept at bay. Only one thing mattered. Reclaim. what she lost.

Shadows deepening

Hitome woke with a start, slowly coming to awareness that she was hearing the sounds of her lovers dropship, unmistakably approaching outside, for a final landing. She had fallen asleep earlier that night in one of the chairs before the fire while waiting for him and smiled as she looked around seeing the Keep now nearly deserted. Her smile deepened as, in an instant she rose and without cloak or proper footwear headed out into the snowy exterior to surprise him. She breathed a sigh of thanks that the monks had recently replenished the fire both in the pit and lit the torches along the path creating a warm glow of light bathing the exterior. The path, though already snowy was still passable in her slippers as she hurried to meet him.

She wore a festive dress, the bodice a swirling design of ice blue with ivory accents, lace sleeves and a flowing skirt of chiffon, ice blue as well. She had picked it out, something different she thought, choosing it from the many gifts Math'ra, then Sephirot of the Geburah, had given her when they first moved together, after the demise of her home at the Ordo. Her eyes now focusing to the left, to the field used as landing pad, failed to notice any of the scenes on the Calcada style path as she progressed. She saw only him. She loved watching him pilot in, so skilled was he in ways she possibly never would be. Her heart skipped a beat as she saw the tall handsome Khanid exit from his ship, having to duck not to hit his head as he did.

But something about his facial features, alight in the torchlight surrounding them, caused her to stop and stare. His mouth was set in anger. His eyes.... what was it... She could not place the look. He advanced on her in a determined way that scared her for the first time ever.

Hitome faltered in her steps and as he began nearing her, she fell back toward the benches, a frown crossing her face. Hesitantly she called out to him. "M..Math'ra? It's me ... Hitome. I came out to.. surprise you. Is everything alright?"

He stormed toward her, a fierce, almost savage look taking over his features, causing the recent scar along his left temple to turn a flaming ugly red. Still he said nothing, only taking in how she looked as he seemed to tower above her now.

She tilted her head in puzzled concern then smiled falteringly to him and took a step toward him now tentatively reaching her hand up to caress his face on the left, softly tracing the jagged scar. "Whatever has you so angry can be left here. Peace reigns, at least when up here. We can talk once inside love...if.. you want?"

At her touch she noticed him almost flinch but his eyes, appearing black in the firelight, seemed to soften just ever so much. Hitome breathed a sigh of relief at her obvious misunderstanding of him on arrival and looked up at him in love, her hand still cupped against his cheek. " I was hoping you would come visit tonight. I've missed you so much this week. W.. we have hardly even spoken... since KPV headed into Null sec fighting."

Still she noted his hesitancy and the lack of his usual greeting to scoop her into his arms, causing her brow to crease in yet another wave of confusion. Finally after several palpable moments passed and he still said nothing, she slowly dropped her hand from his face.

" What is it love... You're scaring me... What has you so.. quiet and obviously upset?"

Math'ra moved toward her now slowly, his left arm coming around her shoulders and resting to brace her back as he bent down to speak softly into her ear. "You my love. You are whats wrong."

His words, a mere whisper sent as much shock through her, perhaps even more than the sudden sharp sensation of pain that knifed through her body. As if hit by a bolt of lightening, she felt suddenly knocked back and upwards by the swift movement of his right arm. He held her as he drove the cold steel of a sword deeply into her abdomen, up to its hilt. His face mere inches above hers, She felt his hot breathe on her cheek as he twisted the blade before ripping the sword upwards assuring he affected every vital internal organ. A wicked smile curled on his lips as he watches her look of utter stunned disbelief.

Time and events seems to move in slow motion now, as Hitome looked down at the wide drops of blood flowing down the pale blue dress and dotting the snow around her. Her blood, rushing from her with each beat of her laboring heart stained the gown, and she gasped then fell backward when he released her until she slipped to her knees just in front of St Ageroth's statue. Instinctively she gripped the hilt, while staring down at it in horror, noticing the all too familiar black diamonds and sapphires encrusting it. Sluggishly she realized it to be the gift she had given him when they first met. Her lips parted as blood trickled from the left side but she looked into his face, her mind numb as she tried to formulate a question.

Math'ra glowered down at her now, having advanced again, toward her. He planted a boot on her bloody form, and wrenched the sword up and out from her, being sure to finish the job, severing her heart as he did. Then he stepped back to watch her, an odd mix of contempt and victory on his face. The snow around the base of St. Ageroth now crimson, Hitome reached blindly to the statue, feebly trying to support herself against it, and finally stands, only to stumble backward a few paces falling into the snow. Pulling herself up she finally supported her failing body against the prayer room wall. Numb from the cold of death, she looked down at the flow of her own blood now having turned the gown and snow beneath her a deep crimson. Her vision, dim now, as she looks over to him, still trying to form a word.

It finally comes out as a desperate whisper..... "why"...

Math'ra Hiede, seeming so impervious now to her plight, took a step nearer toward her, the look of contempt evident now as he opened his mouth to speak. " Did you really think this was forever? I can no longer be there to watch over you and baby you along. I have no need of you or your childish ways any more."

As he turned to go he added one last thought "Fitting use for that ridiculous blade I'd say." Then with that he tossed the bloody blade at her feet and strode off without another look back, boarded his ship and took off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Seeva moved swiftly into the small room, checking monitors and vital signs even before addressing the physician on duty. "I got your recent urgent call Doctor Jacob... What's going on now?" Hitome's brother looks over at the tank, where his sister hangs by mere threads of life, with a deeply worn worried glance then back to the physicians eyes.

Dr. Jacob Gunning slowly spoke, picking his words carefully as he made adjustments to medications being given to Hitome, her neural implants offering methods only available to capsuleers. "She had another of those.. attacks. Like a Seizure but each time her body fails a little more, vitals drop drastically and I just... I cannot understand what it is that's going on. These lines here.. " he points to the jagged crisscrossing EEG rhythm, " Indicative of nightmares and each one seems to trigger this .. episode only worse every time. We have to snap her out of this somehow...I just don't know how. Seems some wounds have to heal from the outside in. Others from the inside out. Her's seem to be both types. Has me stymied."

Seeva purses his lips and frowns deeply, the usual mirth gone from him over the last month of watching his dearest sis struggle to stay alive. He steps back and paces, arms folded behind him in the small confines then stops, turning slowly back toward Dr Gunning. " I have an idea, I will see if our brother can break from work and help me with this. Maybe. Just maybe..."

He strides out without another word, formulating a plan. " Come on sis hold on just a little bit longer. You are stronger than this. "

Diplomatic ties that bind

July 23, Year 111

Hitome hung her head in deepest sadness as she watched Leopold head back to his room in anger. Waiting until she heard his door close, she turned to search out the ports, watching as the debris floated by. Todays arguments had been tougher than usual and it was all beginning to take its toll. She stared past the debris into the inky blackness of the Sarum Prime sky, lost in thoughts far deeper, uncertain how long she remained motionless. Finally, taking a cleansing breath the small Khanid woman suddenly turned sharply around to take a good look around the place she had been calling home since arriving at Mabnen. It was not so bad, really, seeing as this was remote and afforded some privacy for the more secretive segment of Ordo, known as Tiphareth. For many weeks now there had been much discord among the Tiphs and the rest of the branches, due to Leopold's consistent infighting and lack of trust among others of their own corporation. Some of which had caused a great rift to develop between the Industry branch and it all seemed to be funneling down on the Tiphareth.

Glancing at the Sephirot's closed door again, she breathed her growing mistrust with a whispered thought Your constant paranoia has taken its toll on us all Sephirot... shaking her head yet again in disgust, she headed to her own room, the last along a row constructed from the burned out turret of a lost section of the Naglfar class Dreadnought wreck. Upon arrival in February, it had taken her some time to digest the facts of just what their 'home' was and even just this night when flying over, entering the graveyard, it had seemed to knife through her once again, that they separated themselves so far from the rest of their Corporate members.

Hitome knelt beside the small trunk in her room, opening the top compartment, then carefully she removed several things from it. She proceeded to put together a package she had been preparing for several days. Slipping the daggar from its sheath once more, she smiled at the beautiful jewel encrusted hilt, and the razor sharp edges of the double sided creation. It was indeed a larger version of the one she kept strapped to her thigh at all times, and as such a suitable gift she hoped. One she hoped would end the bickering and infighting among Geburah and Tiphareth once and for all. She gathered several other things, jotted a note in her neocom to the chefs at Mabnen then took off headed for the elevators and her waiting shuttle.

Upon arrival back at the hub of Ordo, she slipped into the great hall to give Da'ath a treat, then headed to the kitchens, helping herself to the small packages set out for her earlier. One last time she checked inside the deep blue and black box at a small festive birthday cake, making sure it was still pristine. One could never tell whom of the mischievous Ordo might sneak in and finger a taste of the icing.

She gathered it all in her arms, bundles overflowing and carefully made her way through the twisting halls to the newly appointed Sepherot Hiede's apartment. On arriving her insides nearly ripped apart with nerves on seeing the two Kameira guards posted outside. Carefully setting the packages down at her feet, she balanced the cake in hands, then after a moments hesitation, she rang the bell located on the left. Moments passed and she began to feel as if she had made a mistake in calculations, when the door swung open with a hiss, and there, towering in front of her was the massive 6 foot 6 Khanid she had befriended months earlier.

Math'ra Hiede, not known for his shyness, stood there a moment taking in her situation, smiled not without some sense of reservations then stepped aside to wave her in. Hitome however stood planted in one spot for a long moment then looking up into his eyes, nodded her headas if giving herself permission to speak, then stated almost in a whisper... "I.. I have come to wish you a Happy Birthday because no one should spend that day alone," she swallowed nervously then went on "and, to extend my hand in both friendship as well as a peace offering from at least one of the Tiphareth."

With that said she thrust the cake box toward him and tilted her head toward some of the 7 packages in her arms and on the floor as her smile nervously formed. And with that she walked in, not realizing at that moment this was the beginning of a love that knew no bounds... into a new life.

Past History: Life at Ordo

Reposted from Ordo Quaesitor forums.

Stardate : August 3 YR 111

Hitome walked away from the inner regions of Ordo Quaesitor still haunted by the hurt in Keter's voice and the look in his eyes. Sepherim had only been back a few short weeks and still she was not able to understand why he could not just let the secrets she guarded be just that. Hers to keep.

She continued to rationalize that there are times and moments when lives depended on some information remaining hidden from all but the eyes they were intended for. The parties involved. Not even the sadness of her Keter would deter her from what she felt to be the only path to take. To remain silent. For one thing, one secret involved a solemn oath to a respected member of the councel of Sephirot, one she respected and loved dearly. The other a lifelong familial battle that was finally being solved the only best way, with the help of several in the Ordo.

Since coming to Ordo Magna, Hitome had never questioned her choice in path. The Tiphareth had been the perfect place for her based on her life ... All her life had been shadows and secretive, and here was the perfect spot for her. Veiled in secrecy nothing was certain.

She smirked as she kept walking, a feeling she had, that her own Sephirot , Aldrith did not believe she had the ability to keep a secret much less anything else of importance. She was certain his opinion of her was low, but she shouldered those thoughts and pushed through the pain of those doubts as always the best she could. She had in fact got quite use to thoughts and words like those throughout her life. One of many obstacles to overcome.


'Well let them think that and doubt all they want, I know I have more secrets than even the walls of our hallowed halls ever shall have.'

She continued walking away never looking back but deep in thought. She would love to tell Sepherim what she has struggled with for months and even years leading up to what was certain to be the greatest test of her abilities thus far. if they only knew... Not only her training since childhood as Cyberknight, She knew her training at the Veto Corp Test Firing range had been profitable. Kale Roche, the Veto Corp Head of Internal Security, had helped her attain a high rank of Marksman that few others had. Kale of course was one notch higher... She had hit point blank every target he launched and with each session her hits were mere millimeters below his, or dead on. It was quite the joke between them of the difference between her ground abilities and her lacking skills in the pod. She was however hopeful that would change in time with the increase in training now that she was with ONSU.

Hitome walked along the halls lost in thought. She looked forward to completing this week's Bloodtear Op in Gehi , along side her two brothers Seeva and Takht, so she would be able to focus more on her duties here in the Ordo. She willed her fears away as she arrived at her shuttle, soon heading off to the Tiphareth home. The one thing she was thankful for was having secretly begun a friendship with Math'ra, of the Geburah much against Leopolds requests. She could not help the smile that formed at merely thinking of that tall Khanid they had treated as an enemy for so many months. It was he alone who filled her with confidence she could accomplish this mission. And He had offered much in way of assisting her with this operative. She was thankful he would be there tonight for the culmination of Bloodtear. It should prove to be a test of everything she had been molded to be thus far in her life. She let out a sigh, thinking, if only Sepherim could know even half the details...

But the dangers were too apparent and the enemy is never fully known. Who her allies and who her enemies are were proven shades of grey during the latest war of the Roses conflict. She would not soon trust just anyone ever again. Not even those in the top. It was safer this way. Secrets had to be kept.

Hitome's thoughts kept tracing and retracing conversations earlier that night that had bothered her most. Why would such a kind devout man, the Keter himself, want her to divulge what she had taken a vow not to tell.... The oath she took seriously. I mean this whole ORDER is one of secrecy and truths buried deep among the fabrics of lies. Why would he nearly order her to tell him something so sacred.

'I cannot nor will I ever lest I endanger the Princeps Archon', she mused. ' In time the truth may be apparent but for now, My small part in this will just have to remain sworn silent.'

The shuttle arrived at the house location, as she expertly flew toward the location of her beloved home docked, and headed into the Elevator to prepare for the events shaping up. Her heart felt lighter as her actions led toward the future...

--------------------

Dreams of Reality

January 23, Yr 111. Pilot for Sarum a Fortiori.

She woke once again, a muffled scream and the cold sweat on her upper lip the only visible sign of struggle. She stared blankly around the sparsely filled room she called home since arriving at Fortiori as she reflected on the newest edition of a dream she'd had since childhood.

She remembered that first time, waking screaming and her father Tarkov had raced in to scoop her into her arms, followed by her two brothers Seeva and Takht. Her brothers had spent turns coming in to comfort her fears but Seeva being only 5 years older had taken it on himself to spend time on a cot with her and they had become close friends. There had been fitful nights for them all, as the dream came night after night, but as she matured it had come less often til only when she underwent tremendous trauma and hardships. She sat up wiping sleep from her eyes as she focused on the open datapad, the digital readout of 0311.

She held her head in her hands massaging her temples while reflecting on the latest change to an ongoing dream. Always before there were changes but never this dramatic. She sighed as she tried to make sense of it.

The dream was set when she is about 5 in age running up a path of stone and dirt heading up an embankment ... she is running toward something that seems to elude her, everything around her is in a muted red color.. trees grass and sky all appear a vivid ruddy red or blood red color. She never seemed to know what she was running toward, until now. She had finally arrived to the top of the embankment and looked over a ravine into a town below. She could see people she assumed were her family and friends running from death. Men had raided the town and were slaughtering and pillaging the village. Nothing was surviving in their wake. She also realized that what ever had been chasing her was closer than it ever had before... But again, the panic that always rose and transcended into reality had woke her before she had her answers.

She stood and began pacing the room wondering what triggered it to return, as she had been sure that graduating and beginning a career with Fortiori was the end of her troubled dream. Deckhard Aura was a tough man to work for however and often, she was in tears over clashes with his temper. She had few friends in the corp and fewer resources or training. She had met her newest "Pirate friend" through one of her many blunders. Flying into a low-sec region and getting caught in a station under gate-camp was not her smartest move. But she having rarely used standard Operating procedures had spoken to him in Local channels to diplomatically work things out, and one particular pirate had assured her safe passage. They had been friends since that moment.

It was Edward who had asked if he could help her learn a few things she was lacking, and after a training session just yesterday, he had casually asked her when she had been home to see her family last. He had encouraged her to do so, and in fact had shown her a few more tricks to stay alive in low sec regions. The dream returning tonight clinched it. She would head home on a loose system to system ratting as she headed home to Gehi to visit family.

Hitome surveyed her sparsely fit room, a small bed, a trunk with her meager belongings and a few weapons set out on a low slung table. It had taken alot to get her into combat pilot training after she had worked with Industry for most her life, and resources were limited after that, so Tarkov had told her. However, her Father had used his numerous ties and soon she had a position with Sarum A Fortiori and she had begin her pod Pilot days.

She stopped from pacing to look again at the time. 0328. She sat down at a small table filing a flight plan, submitting it to the docking Manager then she scurried around the room dressing, preparing, and was soon out the door heading toward the docks.

The only difficulty with her plan was that she had needed to get going before Commander Deckhard would be aware. She was certain he would never understand or agree. But the Harbinger she had got when her one good friend in Fortiori had donated a sizable sum into her account was her pride and joy. The insurance and fittings had depleted her account to nearly nothing, so she needed to get busy making some isk. Today's trip was going to be a nice escape from the boredom and repetition and silence of Fortiori. A twofold excursion of Ratting in belts on the way to and from Gehi.

She arrived on the dock at 0348, handing the finalized but loosely scheduled flight plan to the docking manager Scotty, then contacted Andrea to arrange her Crew Chief time to ready the ship. Time was of the essence, and she needing to be far away long before her CEO would ever know, for she was certain Deckhard Aura's response to her would be "get out to the missions and forget that insanity. You know your job so Do it, or I will blow that ship you are flying out of the skies."

Her mind was filled with thoughts past and future as she was prepared by crew to enter the pod that early morning. Just why that dream had resurfaced she still had no idea but she knew It felt good to have a plan and to be escaping back home after so long.

Accessing Hitome Kei's Security codes: Access code located. Ded File opening.

[Psychometric profiling questionnaire to assess pilot stability. Analysis made by CONCORD prior to accepting a new pilot from taking his license.]

Describe the perfect room.
Open, spacious, no clutter. tiered shelves in a corner with a myriad of candles in blue, black, silver colours all alit casting ripples and shimmering light all around the room. On one wall would be a photo of a thunderstorm at twilight. A massive window overlooking the vast open space i so love to fly in. a simple low bed, or mat that can be taken up after slumber so the room remains uncluttered. a desk, simple cut edged glass and metal. a bookcase with precious mementos and richly bound books of a childhood long ago. tatami mats and two shoji screens dividing portions of this perfect room i would call my own....

But really, any room can be perfect .. just depends upon the company one is with, and the purpose of that room.

What is more important: status, personal gain or self-satisfaction?
At the end of the long day, if i cannot look into a mirror and find satisfaction in what i have done that day, there is nothing else that matters. Status is good, a purpose and place, but again it is devoid of meaning without self satisfaction . Personal gain. ahhh monitory? belongings? or a deeper meaning? And still what is important most to me is the simplicity of it all and i have to find satisfaction in what i have done. bottom line. Then everything else lines up as it should.

What is the perfect time of day? Weather?
There is to me no true perfect time of day, for each moment is defined by the peace prevailing, the persons sharing those moments, or the situation itself. However i have always been partial to those moments as the sun is setting, and dusk gathering... and the hours lasting through the night. The peace prevails, the chatter and hum of day fades and one finally can think and move freely or so it seems. A perfect time of day is the nighttime hours.
The perfect weather is a still quiet misty rain on a warm summer day. The perfect weather is a spring shower pouring from the skies washing away the dirt and bringing beauty to my world. The perfect weather is a violent upheaval of all i know with lightening tearing through the skies so intense one can feel the energies of it in your soul. Perfection is a snowstorm swirling and eddying white flakes deeeper than one thinks it can, watching it envelope and overcome every item in its path til edges are blurred and a world looks pure and pristine again. Perfect weather.. a warm golden sunlt day where a breeze plays upon my skin enough to blow my hair around. Perfect was the reddish skies of my home and the stifling hot days as I would escape the doc and race out to the pond.

In essence every day is perfect. I just have to look a bit deeper and there is always an air of perfection to be found.

What era of history most intrigues you? What would you have been doing if you had lived in that period?
My most vivid memories are my grandparents coming home after their explorations and archeo finds were shared. I found myself dreaming often of the Eve gate and what it might have been like to live in those distant days when The New Eden was first colonized. To be able to move freely from this world to the one once known of as Earth... traveling through wormholes! How unbelievably exciting would it be? I envisioned myself as being an explorer and archeo-engineer searching for artifacts or perhaps just searching out for new places to colonize..

What kind of animal would you be?
A melanistic Panther (black panthera) , sleek strong, sinuous, liquid moments, the deeper lines of a coat overshadowed by the dark melanistic coloring. Perhaps Panthera. Perhaps leopard. Perhaps Jaguar. perhaps snow leopard. The exact species i am not sure, but i would be strong cunning, independent, exotic, beautiful, and a creature of the night.

Describe the perfect mate.
Someone that understands me. He does not exist of that i am certain, so my mythologic perfect mate is: strong, cunning, rugged, kind, loving, giving, patient, intelligent, fun loving, and handsome( as i see that quality.. not necesarrily what the universe deems it to be.) He is an exceptionally gifted pilot that can out perform me yet teaches me patiently. He is funny, loves laughter pranks and jokes. One that does not easily anger. Creative, compassionate, amourous, sensual and tolerant of my flights of fancy... one that will hold me in their arms when I'm scared or let me fly out into dangers to expand my stengths...one that shares in all moments of a day or night..One that indulges my loves of experimenting with my cooking and baking hobby and a mate i can smile with at the end of along mission.

What is more important: honor or success at all costs?
Honour. There is none other answer here.... Success at all cost will fail me if at the end of that success i am alone and miserable. In all things Honour must always be foremost. Honour with success is a plus. But to return from battle having acted honourably no matter the outcome is is the only way to hold a head high and find peace inside.

Describe your most vivid memory, dream or daydream from childhood.
My childhood was one of much upheaval and turmoil with problems on my mothers side, and Khanid II policies as they were, I still recall vividly the day my father came to me to take me on a walk and share truths of my early life. I recall it because he took me on a walk past the small stream I loved to play near and sat me on a cold rock to finally talk with me... He did not want me to fall to the same fate as my sisters and mother, therefore we had moved to Gehi! He moved the homestead into low sec regions to expand his business dealings, and began hiding me so to speak amongst my brothers, working side by side with them on the docks wearing those horrid baggy clothes so I was mistaken for a boy... and in the industrial areas of his new business. ... I had to do studies in the night hours and work alongside them in the day. A very cloistered existence it was...but it taught me much in those days...and honed me for what i was later to become.

What is the perfect musical form?
Music to me can come from nearly anything and perfection is in the delight to the soul that it ignites. What i find perfect... is to you perhaps just noise. And what delights me one day, i will turn away from the next. Ambient overtones one day are replaced with loud hard driving beats the next. Synth and Guitar.. whatever my heart craves. Or sometimes the music heard from a rainstorm as you walk along a stone path and hear the ebb and crescendo of each sound it creates as it falls, rivulets form and cascade around. This world is overflowing with a form of music if one is willing to stop and take another look at and there is perfection in it all. But i think the most beautiful music is the sounds in battle of the deep resonant firings of an abaddon followed by the pew pew of fleet all around, the cannon explosions, the quick rapid pulse of my Harbinger, and all around the music of our enemy shattering into a million shards of scrap.

If you were to go on an expedition what three items would you pack first?
Depending on what i am exploring is key, so many specifics will depend on the end goals. however the first three basics would be to pack away my pulse modal laser pistol ( a gift from a friend), my extensive list of maps of our known solar systems, and my cooking supplies. (what you think I am going to suffer eating those horrid rations all day each day??)

What part of your body best represents you as a person?
An inked masterpiece of art i helped create of an ancient cross (ankh) on a chain, randomly tossed upon its canvas backdrop... above my heart. to specify: that part of my body is above my heart....

What is your most recurring dream?
I was possibly only 3 when the dream began... it recurred in a progressive style. The scene: a path leading up and around its many curves. trees and flowers along the path, some trampled some intact, distant homes among trees farther of the path. Everything muted in colors of grey and ruddy red... a sky angry with clouds that appeared to ebb and flow in a ruddy red color. I ran away from something. i ran toward something else. Nothing made sense. And each redreaming of the setting added another clue to the story, another distance reached further up the path, running from chasing toward...yet still nothing made sense...
until. not long ago.
The young hitome of perhaps 5 in this dream... finally ran the distance up this path she had taken so many times before, and at the top found she was overlooking a gorge drop of perhaps a 30 meters down into what she instinctively knew was her village. Thatched roofs and outbuildings were ablaze of fire, men on horses wielding swords and weaponry and everywhere cries and screams .. a scene of mayhem and destruction. In the dream there is no fear any longer. She just ... takes a step forward to head down and try helping those she knew were family and friend without considering her own safety.
and at that moment ... she feels two strong hands grab her shoulders on either side, spin her around...and a young man of perhaps 12 .. piercing eyes, long black hair, wild yet gentle look in those eyes... is staring down at her.
I still remember the words he spoke. Words that haunt me still... echoing in the darkend reaches of night when i try laying down..

*come with me to live. Stay here and you will certainly die. For surely we can fight this when we are stronger.*

And he lets go my shoulders while holding a hand out for me to choose.

I chose ....wisely.

What is the perfect vehicle or shipclass? Color? Options?
Ever since my first encounter with the Pilgrim i have since ... desired that ship most. Perfection is what defines that beauty.. I want all options top of the class and as for colour if i could chose, twould have to be black and some cobalt blue etchings ... cloaking is a must. top t2 fits. and .. a race into the stars we go...
The Raven Navy issue however has often been another of the more perfect ships.
A grand beauty to watch in battle.
But the most coveted of ships has to be Abaddon.. having flown in the shadow of that magnificent ship a few times now... gleaming golden perfection.

Describe the perfect meal.
Any meal prepared together with the one you love. Something simple elegant definable and a feast for the tastebuds. Perhaps: Pan seared salmon with a glaze of ginger soy sauce over top of rice. served with a warm spinach and portobello mushroom salad, and and complemented by a chilled bottle of spiced wines from the khanid region. followed by a simple desert of raspberries and blueberries tossed in yogurt, with fresh mint .......good company, peaceful music. perfection.

What is your favourite colour?
The infinite inky black of space The black and blue streaks of my gamma crystals firing... the black and red of enemy exploding into balls of fire. and the black night skies I once again fly safely amongst.

How far could you be pushed before becoming violent?
Having been forefront of the aggro before I have built defenses and hardeners around that part of my being to prevent easily succumbing to a fireball. I tanked that part of me well. I would sooner burst into gails of tears than violence, yet i know that if pushed far enough my breaking point will be discovered. Pity the man or woman that finds that trigger.

Describe an interesting part of the Scriptures.
I have rarely studied the scriptures... but there are a few that bring me great moments of clarity... this being the one in my heart:

"I will not hesitate when the test of Faith finds me, for only the strongest conviction will open the gates of paradise. My Faith in you is absolute; my sword is Yours, My God, and Your will guides me now and for all eternity."

- The Scriptures, The Prophet Kuria, "Paladin’s Creed"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Give me time I will be clear. Given time you'll understand
What possesses me to right what you have suffered.
I'm in this mood because of scorn. I'm in a mood for total war.
To the darkened skies once more and ever onward.
There is no faith in which to hide. Even truth is filled with lies.
Doubting angels fall to walk among the living.
I'm in this mood because of scorn. I'm in a mood for total war.
To the darkened skies once more and ever onward.
Victory not Vengeance creed.

Our domain, this kingdom come now godless lands whose ways are lost.
Without the strength to carry on. All values lost all virtue none.
Did you think you would be saved by burning flags to cleanse yourselves of shame?
Or are you afraid as you stare back at your face?
are you ashamed, are you afraid, by destroying what the gods had made?
Did you think you would be saved?

Our Empires will be done until the day I see this kingdom has been won.
No more the servants of the weak devoid of thought or light to seek.
I'll leave no walls, no veld unturned.
Every tower to be razed to the dust from which it came.
None will be spared, no remnant saved.
Victory not vengeance creed.

What is the purpose of war?
War in our times is inevitable for all factions have their own perception of what war ultimately accomplishes. For me. My heart in the matter. It is a necessary fact of life to ultimately assure Amarrians maintain the balance, and that victory soon followed by peace, prevail.

Describe the perfect weapon.
My ability to stay clear and focused in battle and make the best decisions that will eventually conquer and defeat my enemy is the perfect weapon. All others are merely tools to lead to that end goal.


In your last 24 hours of life, what would you most want to accomplish?
To right any wrongs i have done with anyone in my life. To take time to hold someone's hand and tell them how i have always felt. To write a memoir and legacy for my children and those i care for, to encourage others around me that though i am leaving there are reasons to continue the fight. To give all i have ever made to those that will need it most after I am gone... and to find a way to beat that destiny by acquiring a series of jump clones... or possibly would just head into the wormholes and find if there are ways to beat death once and for all...

What is your preferred method of attacking the enemy: a full frontal assault or sneaking up from behind? Or maybe other different one?
At this early stage of my training all i know is the full frontal assault methods but in a real battle the ability to slip in unnoticed and then attack by surprise is an adrenaline rush. It seems to be the better method to ensure defeat for an enemy as well. Each battle of course is an excercise in strategy and defense... and i look forward to experiencing all forms so i can better answer this at a later date.

What Gods could you have descended from (by your personality etc)?
I most possibly decending from a product of the Odin/Frigg union, as the goddess frigg and I have much in common with those two amazing norse gods.

What emotions are acceptable to display in public?
Each culture defines and redefines what is and is not acceptable and in each moment of life we have to take a deeper look into where we are and what we are doing as opposed to that emotion. I will only discuss two most discussed forms of emotion... In my heart i have no qualms with affection and anger being displayed, depending upon what ithe end goal is at that time. To discuss argue and get something out and resolved is a delicate art of the display and usually does not happen, but each person/creation is unique and each emotion presses us further into the roles we hold in public. I for one smile when i see a couple in love holding hands... and a argument ending in a handshake and friendship renewed. I guess we all have opinions on nthis and many want to turn away and wave the hand of dismissal so it is not dealt with. emotions were given us by our great God of Amarr so why would we want to hide them away??

What is the worst crime a person can perform?
Deceit and trickery to a trusted friend. Destruction of a friendship over something that is of no consequence a day later. It does not kill. But it cripples for life and that is worse than anything.

Who is your greatest hero and why?

My greatest hero is my grandparents (yes i am related to those famous astroarchaological explorers)) who have been first and foremost to encourage me in words and actions to follow my dreams despite all obstacles in my way. Those back home that said "A girl cannot fly these ships madeer" not only got a kick in the shins (when i was very young) but now have my sympathy as they were oh so wrong.

Is it more satisfying to achieve success or to strive towards it?
Wow... uhmmm you know as i am writing this and nearing the acheivement of another trial I realize that striving toward it brings such satisfaction that I nearly taste the victory at the end. I always thought the actuall success left me feeling let down ... the "Now What " syndrome. Yes indeed striving for it is a heady liquor that is filling.

What traits in others can you really not tolerate?
Lying. Deceiving. Dishonesty.

What quality in others do you respect the most?
Honesty, kindness, respect, honour, humility, truthfullness.


Describe the perfect trap.
The one that ensnared my heart to dedicate a life time in service to the Amarrian Empire piloting a ship and protecting others. I really had no chance at all in fighting it off... one time behind the controls of the and my whole being was scrammed, webbed and enslaved to this life. (and i never shall regret it)


What is the worst sin?
Never living out your dreams. Giving up without a fight.


If the FTL comms buzzed in the middle of the night, who would you hope it would be?
my corp mates or ceo calling me for help in a mission.

What do you fear the most?
Letting my corps mates down in a battle by attacking the wrong things... Not knowing enough in a pvp situation or freezing thereby causing one of my fleet to be unnecessarily attacked.


What is your best trait?
That i care so deeply about that which i believe in and would do all in my power to succeed for the greater good ...up to and including laying down my life for the rest of my mates to escape... should that time ever come.

What is your worst weakness?
I don't multi task well (but am geting better) ... and i still shake alot when in the heat of batttle...Perhaps my worst weakness is to go off without thinking of consequences and finding myself in compromiseable /dangerous situations as a result....IE I act before i think something through... but I'm trying to change that now.

What is your most irresistible motivation?
I do love to go on with the Poetic wording.
I am too wordy.
Pity the ones who actually read all the way through this.


Anything you would like to add?
yeah. Thank you for helping me to attain my dreams and for this chance to be a part of an organization going somewhere... I just hope i never let anyone down.

((Hitome sets her pen down, reads over what she wrote, frowning a little at some of the more sensitive things she wrote but hits 'submit' and forward the responses to whomever will read and decide her future. She walks out to a horizen of hope and destiny.))

Fading into Nothingness

The Sound.

Rhythmic clock-like and distant.

It fades, then moves closer. Louder. Softer again.

A hiss to one side. Sensations of heat. A distant murmuring.

Words? Perhaps, but nothing that makes sense.

A touch. Cold steel pressing through her skin. Sensors sharpening.

Pressure becomes pain. Pain blurs the sounds. A tinkling of glass on glass.

Then, nothing once more.

Her vision clears. Were her eyes shut? And for how long? She blinks. She is unable to move much else.

Her eyes swivel left to right to look around her, what little she can see. Something shimmery, then farther off, Smooth Caldari steel grey walls fade into various shades of grey and black.

Another hiss, louder this time followed by a blinding light, Her thoughts as the sound, seeming to focus. A monotone voice distant, then air hissing all around, smoke rising around her. Or is it Steam. No. Fog? Cold and moist. She fights weakly to remain conscious but the fog rolls around her .. then nothing, as her eyes slowly close again.

Awakening. Thoughts clearer this time. She feels pain in every part of her body. Searing, white hot pain like nothing she ever felt before. More aware, her chest rises in rhythmic fashion though she knows she is not initiating it. Sounds. Nearer this time. Or is it just that she is closer to consciousness. Body floating. Moving through something viscous, while suspended. She is more aware of other sensations. Cold. Heat. Pain. Fear. Loneliness. Confusion.

She opens her eyes, but again is blinded by the intense white light.

She kicks out and moves through the gelatinous amniotic fluids, now more keenly aware of her situation. Her isolation. She stares through the glass partitions just within reach, making out several figures. Her thoughts fade and ebb with confusion. Acutely aware again of searing pain, she closes her eyes but fights the numbing of her thoughts this time. The one word she keeps rolling around and around in her rapidly numbing mind. why?

Her eyes open. She looks around once more, trying to make sense of what she sees. But the figures, now pressing buttons on a panel while looking at her, and once again she feels the cold permeate her being, His name floats on the edges of her memory just before ... just before everything fades to darkness.